Here we go again.

I (once again) have been slacking on my Metro riding. This morning it was traffic and the fact hat it was raining which would have put me at the Addison Road Station instead of Morgan Boulevard which I swore I would not go to again. It baffles me that that station scares me more than Naylor Road and I used to park at the Legend Nightclub over there for $3.00 a day. It was also a slight problem which the fact that there is an escaped sex offender on the loose and he was last spotted coming out of a McDonalds on Central Avenue near the station I park at according to a news report that I read yesterday. I have yet to hear of a positive but I will keep you posted on the capture.
Then to my dismay as I was trying to find a link to the above article I read on this for your reading pleasure I stumbled upon this interesting piece of news about one of my route choices home– at last resort since the armed police officers with guns drawn were spotted by me last week - http://www.nbc4.com/traffic/6624159/detail.html. It looks like me and the rest of DC will be taking PA Avenue home.
All the more reason to run after work with my “Partner In Crime” for our MARATHON TRAINING……that’s right, you heard it here first, we are both running the San Diego Rock and Roll Marathon on June 4th. We are training with TEAM IN TRAINING which is an awesome organization that helps to “raise funds to support the Society's research, education and patient programs to meet our ultimate goal: CURES for leukemia, lymphoma and myeloma”. Our goal is to raise $4,000 each which will go towards the above. We will also sponsor and run in honor of a local blood cancer survivor and also in support of loved ones and friends we know that have suffered this terrible disease.

Now that I think about it – I could leave my car here and run the marathon or “ “IRON Woman” to my house. J/K

~S~

Crazy 8's

Finally, the ‘Chro has come to its senses. The 8-car trains for the OC. Glory, glory, halleluiah!! http://www.wmata.com/about/met_news/story.cfm?ID=560 Granted, the middle 2 cars are still packed to the gills since people will ALWAYS be stupid, but at least us smarties have more options – you know us, we’re the ones who actually spread out down the platform as the Voice suggests. See, the Voice really does know what it’s talking about – why won’t you obey the Voice? (Ok, I’ll stop – I’m starting to sound like a Kool-Aid drinkin’ Nike wearer…) “’We would like Orange Line passengers to pay special attention to the system and train announcements, and to check the 'next train' signs to see when an eight-car train is arriving at their station so they can move to the far ends of the platform to access all cars,’ said Mr. Hughes.” See? Mr. Hughes respects the Voice – he’s down with OPP (yeah you know me!).

I only see one thing wrong with the new 8-car trains: it’s only a 6-month TRIAL. Yes. A TRIAL. WMATA is treating us OC riders like guinea pigs, and that’s not right, since I’d rather be treated like…um…I dunno. “Metro is able to run eight-car trains on a limited basis until power upgrades are made systemwide.” Why, why, WHY doesn’t WMATA do the upgrades first, then add the 8-car trains? They know the 8-car trains are going to help. I mean, duh, why wouldn’t they?? Now I’m afraid that I’ll be on an 8-car train one day, minding my business while getting my ass grabbed during my morning commute, and the power will suddenly go out, and I won’t even be able to turn around to see if my ass-grabber was cute. C’mon, ‘Chro, get your priorities straight – can’t you see that mine are??

Happy Tuesday, everyone – try not to get blown away by the Katrina winds out there!

~B~

Yeah…

His twin was on the BBB with me tonight. It was a combination between “SOUL GLOW” and Lionel”
~S~

Confirmed – No bus for me….

I still have yet to grace metro bus riders throughout DC with my presence and this article I found on WTOP.com confirms that I will not be doing so anytime in the near future “Metro Bus Passenger Wounded During Robbery” http://wtop.com/?nid=25&sid=680897.


In case you were wondering my secret wise sources tell me that the bus pictured to the left is either the L2 or the L4 which would be my bus route of choice (to the “doctor”) that drives down hoity toity Connecticut Avenue (I am sure I would be safe – I don’t own any Chanel or Prada – “YET” so no one would be interested in my most expensive piece of clothing being the Anne Taylor suit(s) that I own).

On one final "random" note - As I was driving home from the "doctor" mentioned above last night - to my surprise Suitland Parkway was closed between Alabama Avenue and Naylor Road - forcing me to take a detour down Minnesota Avenue to get back on Alabama and then proceed to Naylor Road and then back on Suitland Parkway. Two things were learned during this detour - It should be legal to talk to your best friend on the phone while driving through the ghettos of S.E., DC so she can hear you say "uh look, police activity, oh shit! surroundiong the car and guns are drawn", and two - I am now the master of the DC ghetto backroads in case further detours happen.


~S~

Can I make reservations for happy hour??

There’s nothing like waiting 65 minutes for a bar table at the restaurant that’s at the bottom of your building, only to be smashed into a corner because the guy at the table next to you insists on scooting his chair back as far as possible. I LOVE THE CITY! The chivalry, the consideration for others…it’s outstanding here. At least I got my expensive cheeseburger (split it with H, of course – I’m not a pig, unless we’re talking about sushi, right S and JJ??) and pinot noir.

After that waiting experience, I never expected to wait for the ‘chro at 8pm on a Wednesday at rush hour-busy station. I soon found out that there was a power outage at Eastern Market, thus causing a delay in both directions. No offense to New Carrollton/Largo peeps, but all I care about is VIENNA. Yeah. Call me selfish – won’t be the first time! So, instead of crushing the sardines further into the train as the other peeps did, I decided to wait for the next OC. Please answer me this: Why do they tell you there’s a delay, but give you no sort of time-line as to when the next train will be pulling through?? And to top it all off, the “Voice” that tells the station of the delay sounded pre-recorded. What the?? I mean, c’mon – I’m suspicious of too many things in my life to start doubting the Voice. Mr. Intercom Man, I love you – why must you betray me??

Since the next OC was 12 minutes out, I decided to board the incoming BBB – I figured I might as well have a comfortable ride to Ross, then jump on the OC for a one-stop, sardine-filled ride to C-house. However, when I de-boarded at Ross, I checked the racing board – OC to Vienna: 1 minute. W……T……..F??????????? Is my timing so f’ed up?? But, I couldn’t complain once the train pulled into Ross, because it was EMPTY. Yay!!! After a 30-minute wait, I somehow managed to have a pleasant ride home.

In closing, thank you, OC/BBB, for working together to provide me with a pleasant commute. And Mr. Intercom Man? If you clean up your act, you might get some this weekend. ;)

~B~

….Slow and Boring - HA! Try somewhat amusing.

To my surprise (well not really, since they are usually broken) as I turned the corner to walk down the escalator at Farragut West last night they was a woman caught at the bottom of the escalator. Literally caught! Her skirt had somehow become trapped in the escalator and there were three men trying to rescue her. The more I think about it I wonder what the scene was like when she initially became a piece of metro property? One will never know…..

~S~

“Christ is the Answer”

Wow – I found the answer to something and in the craziest place – in a tunnel while stopped in a train between Smithsonian and Federal Triangle. This nice little message was scrolled into the concrete inside the tunnel. Now I must spend the rest of the day pondering how on earth it got there. The explanation I came up with while staring at it for 2 minutes was that someone was trapped in the tunnel and that was their only hope. Now you all know I have a vivid imagination so I am sure I will come up with a better explanation than that after I sit here and think about it for a while.

On a totally separate note. I know HATE is a strong word and we should not use it, but do not fuck with me until I get my coffee in the morning and at least get a couple sips down. This coffee thing was just reintroduced into my life recently and I am enjoying the addiction again. Here’s a message to you STARBUCKS milk filler upper or whatever you are – GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY WAY so I can get my Splenda packets. Take the milk containers elsewhere and fill them. GRRRRR!

Happy Tuesday everyone! (Well it is now that I have downed half of my tall drip)

~S~

For shame, B

(I don't care who ya are - that's FUNNY!)

How could I have missed it? The online MetroStore!!! I can’t believe I’m just now discovering it! Had I only come across it before Christmas…well, you can only imagine the immense amount of gratitude I would have received. Please, browse, then send me your “Wishlist.” But don’t expect the $90 totebag. I’m thinking more along the lines of the Metro Bus Bank, or the notecards featuring the Bus to Fort Totten. Or there’s always the handy-dandy gift card!!! http://www.dcmetrostore.com/ S, I’ve already ordered charm bracelets for you, H and me! We’re sooooo bracelet buddies!

Fairly uneventful ‘Chro rides last week. Decided to leave the blog in the capable hands of my S. And yes, I know the boys from Mile High blew it yesterday…believe me, I know. Because of several gentlemen (ahem – I use that term LOOSLEY) at work and JJ, I don’t think the tears will stop.

Happy MOANday everyone, and safe ‘chro travels!

~B~

"Hello Motivation Are You There?"

I would have written last night but I was in a foul mood, tired and am trying to take a break from the computer that my husband says is “a problem” Anyhow…. After I waited for 10 minutes for the BBB last night at McPherson Square (and watched two OC’s shoot on by), I was fortunate enough to have to stand and hang on for dear life until the Addison Road station (two stations before I was to get off). Lucky for me and everyone else on the train we were entertained by the 300 LB woman who literally took up a whole seat and was snoring like a freight train the whole ride, as people were standing there talking about her. Now since I have tact (sometimes), I was having conversations to myself in my head about this. I kept thinking that when the noises stopped that she was dead and kept praying for her to continue snoring (as annoying as that was). All went well and she departed with the rest of the world at Addison Road.

I took the commuter bus today and may get a chance to experience my first METRO BUS (L2 or L4 - whatever that means) experience when I go to the doctor this afternoon. I could take the train but I am thinking I may want to test this bus thing out. I will keep you posted. ~OUT~

~S~

“God is up to something good”

Must not be in Maryland though. I really wish Metro Police (can we even call them that?) would give tickets to the jackasses that double park in parking spaces at the Largo station. Yes, I am bitter. First because I got a $25 ticket a while back due to the lack of “normal, non permit holder” parking spaces that were available forcing me to park in a permit only (I was pissed and rebelling – what can I say) spot and also because it is asinine and ignorant! Oh, wait, how could I forget where I am parking. I keep having memory lapses about the arrogance of people in that part of P.G. County, because apparently they are in denial about living in a shit hole. They may drive nice cars and live in large houses but I guarantee you they do not have a damn place for anyone to sit inside that nice house – due to the absence of furniture. I could go on for days (thank you PMS – for striking at a wonderful time – at least I am not in the machete aisle at Home Depot like the last time when it was this bad) but I will stop myself before I get in trouble (new concept I am working on).

In addition, on a side note… (WTF is the deal with my horoscope today – rather appropriate – given my situation, however I am not going to take the advice – I am entitled to be bitchy one day)

Try to see the positive facets of people. Relax and do not get so worked up over your own internal drama. You are the one responsible for creating this turmoil. Find comfort in a creative project (I am the most “uncrafty and uncreative” person there is) Do something that you love to do and that makes you truly happy (shopping!). There is an expansive feeling in the air that is likely to amplify whatever mood you project (PMS!).

This picture will describe it all….

Use you imagination as to how my ride home last night went. I will say one thing – 16 year olds SHOULD NOT BEAR CHILDREN.

Out!

~S~

For the LITERATE - the following is a public service announcement compliments of (http://www.soc.ucsb.edu/sexinfo/print.php?article=contraception&refid=004), with a few of my own comments added in red.

About Birth Control Pills

Birth control pills are oral contraceptives that are extremely effective at preventing pregnancy. (Please take that into consideration when you become sexually active, for your sake, but mostly for mine and metro patrons throughout the DC area). They do this by either preventing ovulation, thickening the cervical mucous, or changing the endometrial lining of the uterus. There are two main types of birth control pills: combination pills and progestin-only pills.

What Do Birth Control Pills Look Like?
Birth control pills come in packages that contain one month’s supply of pills. They either come in 28-day packs or 21-day packs.
The 28-day packages come with three weeks worth of “active pills” and one week’s worth of “inactive”, or reminder, pills. The active pills are the pills that actually contain the hormones that prevent pregnancy. The only function of the inactive, or reminder pills, is to keep you on track so that you start your next pack on time.
The 21-day packages only contain active pills. When you finish the pack you must wait seven days before starting the next pack. (You can even accessorize them with rhinestones and fancy designer packs....ha)

How to Use
Birth control pills are most effective when taken at the same time every day. This can be especially important because some types of birth control pills are more time sensitive than others. (Please don't forget...please, I am begging!)

When To Start Taking The Pill?
There are two different ways to start taking the pill. You can either start taking them on the first day of your period (first-day starters), or on the first Sunday after your period starts (Sunday-starters). If you are a Sunday-starter and your period starts on a Sunday then you should take the first the pill then, not a week later. You should talk to your doctor about which method of starting the pill is best for you. (I take the pill and I am even confused by this....jesus. )

You Should Not Take The Pill If You:
· Smoke and are over the age of 35. (eh - when I smoked I took those bad boys and I turned out fine. Not condoning smoking by all means, but please don't let that be an excuse as to why you can't take them. This includes smoking in all forms - pot, crack, hash, whatever - a non-pregnant crackhead is much better than a preganant one with a crack baby on the way)
· Have unexplained vaginal bleeding.
· Have breast cancer.
· Have liver problems.
· Have high blood pressure or cholesterol levels.
· Have a history of blood clots.
· Are pregnant or suspect that you are pregnant. (the pill is not a form of abortion.....idiots)

Cost
The cost of birth control pills vary from about $20-$35 dollars a month depending on who you get them from and whether the pills are generic or nongeneric. This price does not include the cost of the doctor’s examination needed to get a prescription for birth control pills. If you are concerned about the price, you can try going to clinics, such as Planned Parenthood, because they often provide their services at lower prices. ( or no cost....)

What If I Throw Up After Taking The Pill?
If you throw up less than two hours after taking a pill you should take another one. DO NOT take a pill from the same pack! Instead, always keep an extra package of pills on hand and take the pills from this package. (try not to vomit- I do not think Planned Parenthood will provide you with the "EXTRA PACK" mentioned above....if you are bulimic...you should seek an alternative and STOP BINGE EATING!)
If you throw up for an entire day or more try to stay on track wih taking the pill and use a backup method of birth control during the time that you are sick until a week after you get better. (Call the TROJAN MAN....he will help you out)

What If I Want To Get Pregnant?
You can become pregnant immediately after you stop taking the pill, even though your cycles may not be regular for a few months. Despite the fact that it is safe to get pregnant right away, it may be a good a idea to wait until your cycles are regular because it makes it easier for your physician to estimate the due date of your baby (Also - please wait until you can (a) afford to have a child and (b) are old enough to care for one on your own)

Dust In The Wind

Due to the foundation-shaking wind, I decided not to go to The Mall today. Instead, I watched Peyton humiliate himself – UGH, that was heartbreaking to watch. Thank GOD the Mountain Man had a stellar game last night – Go Broncos, beat Ben Rothelisjhosighs (or whatever the F his name is) next weekend and take it to Detroit!

Speaking of dust in the wind, I read an article today in the Post about our good friend Mr. White and his severance package (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/01/14/AR2006011400952.html). Six figures to start, then an additional 6 figures EVERY YEAR? And all this because 9 years ago, he was in high demand, and wouldn’t agree to anything less. This is just too ridiculous to comment on – I’ll let you all make your own call on this, and hopefully, you’re all saying “WTF??” You know what this means, right? Trip fare is going to go up so WE can pay for this. Ugh ugh UGH. I think my favorite part of the article was where the reporter was listing a few of the “embarrassing incidents” on the ‘Chro that led to Mr. White’s “resignation”: “mismanagement of its service for the disabled, a subway crash and the arrest of a pregnant woman for talking too loudly on her cell phone.” Now, the first two seem to be legitimate reasons; however, I’m a little stumped as to how the third incident qualified. Granted, arresting the woman was WAY over the top, but still – pregnancy does not give you the right to act obnoxious and totally disregard showing any respect to your fellow riders. I actually had the balls once to say to a man, after he got off a very loud phone conversation regarding where to meet someone, “You should’ve insisted on the first place you suggested – the place you’re going now is TOTALLY overrated.” HA – nah, I didn’t really say that, but that’s how it went in my head…and furthermore, the crash wasn’t Mr. White’s fault – it was the conductor’s responsibility. I guess that goes with our tendency to blame the person in the highest position of power versus the person who’s actually at fault. Whatevs – in the end, I think it’s ridiculous that he’s getting such a ridiculously large amount of money.

Speaking again of supposed dust in the wind, I’m super-excited for the season premiere of 24 tonight – looks like Jack Is Back!!! Yay!! I heart that alcoholic actor!!

Peace out,
~B~

Shout out to my C-Dawg….(the marathon trainer, lumber hustler, or whatever the hell else you decide to be....)

My (our) loyal reader everyday (so I hear)…..Chris the Greek Rocks the hizzouse! As I sit here waitching the Redskins Game with John I keep thinking that at any minute you will call and pull him together. He has been giddy for a week….control him C-Dawg! We’ll see – Hopefully the “Skins” will pull through – or we will all be taking care of JJ tomorrow and until the next season.
~S~

Sponsered by PAFF (People Against Fake Fur)

People who wear fur, fake or real, should not be allowed to ride the ‘Chro. Do they have any idea how much space a fur coat takes up? Two women wearing the exact same fur-lined puffy coat stood next to me on the OC. Awkward…ha ha ha. Their hoods were taking up the most space, and this one guy who was on the other side of them started sneezing – in fact, he sneezed from Rosslyn to FogBot, then started up again from FogBot to Farragut W. Poor guy – didn’t know people could be allergic to tackiness. Yes, I think fur-lined puffy coats are tacky. Us regular folk should leave all that tackiness to the Olsen twins - even Mr. Blackwell agrees!

On another note – who has some information for me on these Circulator busses?? They look nice, and who knows, I might actually lift my ban on riding busses if their route goes to A-town. Fo’ shizzle.

I might go all tourista-like on Sunday and hit The Mall, so there could be a really good post about the touristas. Sunday, I hope you’re ready for me! Ha ha ha.

(BTW, I was impressed with my post yesterday – thought it was one of my best. And I’m in the mood to toot my own horn. At least S acknowledged it…heart u! And I totally dig how S blends the colors for stations with more than one line – I’m starting that too!)

WTF????

So instead of changing the jibberish or whatever that funny writing is in the previous blog - I am going to leave it and try to determine how it got there. That should give me something to do for at least an hour or so......

~S~

The 10 Commandments – not a trap – a map (Penn Ave. Baptist Church in SE)

In case you were wondering - I have decided to start preaching. I may as well since I am one of few that actually read these signs as I drive to work to make the time go by faster. In addition, since I was busy and all day yesterday, I did not get to post any of the amusing tales of "S", So here goes.

Let me back up a little, the whole reason for driving to work yesterday was the Capitals Game the night before (thanks Trey!) and the 5 (?) beers I had for dinner. I did not feel like getting out of bed and moving at the speed of lightening like I usually do – so I was slow, it was raining and I wanted coffee. I also had a run in with a 20-year old drunk kid named John after the Caps game last night who insisted on spitting, err, I mean having a conversation with me loud enough for the rest of the train to hear. Thank god I was able to duck out at L'Enfant Plaza and he continued on the "Special Blue" from Gallery Place (still trying to figure this out) Therefore, I decided to take my headache and my time and just drive into work Wednesday. As I made my trek down Pennsylvania Avenue and was thinking about what I would do this weekend. It dawned on me as I read yet another sign that on Friday, January 13, 2006, if I so choose (and according to the sign) I could go to the Church of Jesus Christ, Inc. and go to the seminar on "The Truth Behind Hip Hop." I did not realize there was truth behind it although it is interesting to find out what that is. I love the ghetto. Anywho....

I drove again today although there was no excitement this morning. Maybe on the way home or during lunch when I will venture over to Hecht's at Metro Center to replace the pair of shoes that my dogs decided they (he - we know who it was) wanted to eat after I left the house yesterday (Jack has a shoe fetish) with an even cuter pair which will remain on lockdown so the little bastards will not end up at Peking (oliquoretChineseour, chinefriedd and fried chicken store -HA!) being used for General TsoÂ’s and Hunan Meals.

And one last thing, I finally rode the "Yellow Line of Sunshine" Last Friday..it was so wonderful that I already forgot about itÂ…Â…. That will probably be the first and the last time riding the waste of a line. We will see, you never know.

~S~

All right ramblers, let's get rambling!

Looks like Mr. White is on his way out (God, that sounds SO Reservoir Dogs!!): http://www.nbc4.com/news/6005753/detail.html. And no wonder – he worked with the Jersey transit system…ha ha ha, just kidding, Boss Man! Apparently, the director of DC’s DOT is taking over until they find a new CEO. And if the timetable on approving Supreme Court Justices is any indication, it could be a while before the new CEO is chosen. Seeing as “The Metro Board is made up predominantly of politicians, not mass transit experts,” that assumption doesn’t seem too far off-base. Gosh, I wasn’t aware that the Metro Board wielded so much political power…Why not just make Mr. Long-and-Hard-to-Pronounce-Last-Name the new head honcho?? He obviously has the experience, and he’s giving up all of his positions in order to assume the intermittent role (for a hefty sum, no doubt!). I just don’t understand politics, or Corporate America, I guess – why does everything have to be so difficult, when it could be simplified just like that? If I was running the show…well, best not look at that scenario, right? Because we all know that would involve piped-in music and mandatory pole-dancing…

Speaking of poles (ha ha ha), I must revisit an old topic, one I’m sure has been covered by myself and S in previous posts: the pole-hog. Yes, that annoying man/woman/child that insists on wrapping arms/legs around the pole, making it impossible for anyone else to utilize that pole for safety. Maybe I’m totally off-base here, but isn’t that a bit RUDE? Especially when adults do it – c’mon, people, have you no manners? My favorite is the pole-hogs who get angry when you try to grab on – what, is it YOUR pole? I don’t see your NAME on it!!! Have a little common courtesy; if not, watch out, ‘cause karma is a BITCH. Yeah, I’m talking to you, Miss Olivia Newton-John Look-Alike on the OC this morning. I’ll pimp-slap that better-than-everyone-else look right off your face. Yeah, I said it!!

Well, say a prayer for the fate of our ‘Chro system – pray it ends up in the hands of an understanding individual, and pray it doesn’t take an entire session of Congress to find that person.

~B~

Don't gimmie no back-talk sucka!

Man, I came close a few times this morning – no, not to stealing someone’s purse, but to having mine stolen. Someone grabbed onto my purse at every stop – mind you, I only have 3 stops into work, but still. Maybe I should make a sign and tack it to my purse: “This is NOT a safety device, please do NOT grab onto it!” I swear, it was as if people thought my purse was a pole. WTF, mates?? To top it off, each time I yanked my purse out of someone’s grasp, they had the nerve to sneer at me. Yes, I actually saw people sneer. What the hell? I wasn’t hogging the pole or leaning into someone (Why do people do that? Why? I don’t even let my friends lean on me – except when they’re not strong…hee hee). As S said, good thing it was morning and I hadn’t had anything to drink, or I would’ve opened my big mouth to say something off-color.

I guess it was just a bad morning on the OC – haven’t had one in a while, so I should be oh-so-lucky, I know. Still, the nerve of people! Well, I’ll be prepared next time – as Mr. T says, “I pity the fool who grabs my purse!” What, you got somethin’ to say? “Shuddup, fool!”

~B~

Stay Alert. Be Prepared.

“This is a Metro safety tip: Please take a moment to look up from your newspapers and Blackberry devices to make yourself aware of your surroundings.”

Oh, I’m sorry; I didn’t realize I was on patrol for Metro. My mama always told me this “Metro Safety Tip” DO NOT, whatever you do LOOK directly at ANYONE in the eye, unless you do not value your life. This always made sense to me. I have enough people staring at me, why would I want to stare at anyone else. Its bad enough that I have to clench my fists and bite my tongue when I see people staring at me to avoid opening my mouth – which I tend to so gracefully do on occasion (more so after several Sapphire and club sodas).

“Please be advised that there are red emergency call boxes at the end of each car; please only use them in emergency.”

This little “tip” prompted the elderly man next to me to turn his head around like a giraffe and scan the car. Needless to say – we were sitting at the wrong end of the car. Do you think it would have been rude if I looked up from my book (oops, forgot I was supposed to be scanning my surroundings) and told him to look behind him. Probably so.

“In the event of an emergency please remain calm and follow the direction of Metro employees”

HA! Come on now. Do you think that will really happen? Think about it – it NEVER happens. Especially in DC. Everyone does his or her own thing with no regards to anyone else.


So there you have it. This is what I learned this morning. Good thing I didn’t feel like listening to my iPod and instead spent my time paying attention to the train conductor.

~S~

“Fun on the Farm” or Metro

I think that Ginny Paulus of Alexandria and Eleanor S. Tupper of Washington, D.C. bring up excellent points in the letters they wrote to the Express (pg.32, 1/9/06) about the “Door Closing” voice. Why does Metro insist on changing it? No one listens to it anyhow. This is apparent every time a train goes out of service and you are de-boarded due to “door problems”. Do you think the people that crammed onto the train really cared what the voice sounded like that was alerting them that the door was closing – NO!

Another excellent point Ms. Paulus brings up is the abundance of quarters that are returned to you if you need to put money on your fare card and use a large bill. (1) – We are not in Atlantic City striking it big; and (2) – Unless you are in dire need for quarters to do laundry why on earth would you want to walk around with all that change?

My favorite quote of the morning from the two letters mentioned above was the one by Ms. Tupper. “The guy sound like he’s narrating a 1950’s documentary about “Fun on the Farm.”, as she was describing the public service announcements that are randomly played about keeping the station clean, or whatever else Metro feels necessary to tell you about. Hilarious – riding the metro is almost “Farmlike” at times especially with all the animals, er, I mean humans that act like animals that ride with us daily.

~S~

CoNgRaTuLatIioNS ~~~~~~ B!!!!!

No she’s not a “Junior Plant Detective” (unless she really wants to be – then I will declare her one – the picture was funny so I had to use it) she is an AUNT! B’s bro T and his wife K made our little B an Aunt yesterday evening. One thing is for sure – that’s gonna be one spoiled little boy and if I do say so myself he will be quiet the cool little cat too since his birthday is the day after mine.

~S~

The Lone Rider

Well, once again, the ‘Chro has stumped me. Can anyone explain why, on a Friday night, they run the trains 13 MINUTES APART?? WMATA isn’t stupid – I know they know that the young folk of our great city venture out late on the weekend nights to partake in drink with friends, sometimes until a late hour. So why would they, at Metro Center no less, space the BBB and OC trains 13 minutes apart? Isn’t that a little overly cautious?? I suppose I only have myself to blame: I had no companion, no book, no iPod. And as bold as I may be after a few cocktails, no way in hell I’m talking to a stranger on the ‘Chro. Why I’d do it at a bar, on the other hand, is beyond me…see? I don’t even understand MYSELF.

I had the pleasure of riding the OC home with 2 couples and their single friend. They all appeared to be in their mid-30s, and kind of the way I picture myself being at that age: still going out with friends, but leaving at a decent hour. But I invariably became depressed (just slightly), when I realized that the single friend…was…ME. Yes, I know, ridicurous, but still….my four dearest friends happen to be 2 couples – will that be ME in 10 years? Will that be US?? Eh, prolly not – I am a much better dresser than that single friend was (and, if I may be so bold, so much hotter), no way I’ll still be single by that age…RIGHT??!!!!!?? Or maybe I was just jealous because they all had someone to talk to…hee hee…

Go Skins! Good luck today. I’m rooting for them b/c I loath Chris Simms. Well, maybe that’s a little…harsh. But I really don’t care for him. He thinks everything should be handed to him on a silver platter…but I digress…

Happy weekend, everyone! Hopefully my sis-in-law will pop my nephew out soon! Poor thing has been in the hospital since yesterday early morning. C’mon, Aidan, we’re ready for ya, bub!

~B~

I love my friends!

I just want to thank ALL of you for helping me have a wonderful 29th birthday (there is no sense in denying it anymore – you guys helped me have one to remember). I also want to wish “M” a happy 30th today! Thanks for hanging out last night – You impressed us with your bowling skills at Lucky Strike. Between you and “B” and “A” you guys could hustle all of DC with your “closet bowling skills”.


B.L, H.H, B.V, H.V, M.B, R.B, A.F, T!!!!

And I cannot forget my WONDERFUL husband JJ!

(also - lunch at M&S was great too - thanks M.B.!)

I love you all! Thanks again :)

~S~

Ode to a Birfday

I think we’ve been pretty good with the ‘Chro subjects lately (F U Anonymous), so I’ve decided to make a non-Chro post today. S is gonna kill me, but whatevs…it’s been a good life!

Happy Birthday to my Partner-In-Crime! According to her, I seem to be the only person in existence who enjoys celebrating my birthday. And I really don’t see my enthusiasm diminishing…but anywho, I want to make this a superb birthday for my Little S, because she deserves it, no matter what she says, and I’m determined for her to start enjoying birthdays from here on out! So, we’re gonna put on some ugly-ass shirts and shoes and our neck scarves and hit the lanes – bowling lanes, that is – then dinner, then drinks, depending on the amount of alcohol consumed up to that point. It seems that no one in our circle can “drink like we used to,” so I guess we’ll see…

Raise your glasses, one and all! My little S turns….21 today!!!

Much hearts, my dear,
~B~

The Blind Leading the Blind….

As a follow up, ironically, as I got off at McPherson Square this morning, despite the shoes I was wearing (NINE WEST is what I am having for lunch today), I ran into a blind person. Well not literally but he abruptly stopped in front of me on the platform almost causing an accident. It appeared that his walking stick was caught in the grooves on the tile. Maybe Metro should make a video out that. Anyhow, I covertly watched him get on the escalator, go through the exit thingly (whatever they are called) and then get on another escalator to exit the station. Hell, on a good day I cannot do that without walking into something or tripping (especially with these shoes).

My other “incident” of the morning was the elderly man who so kindly sat down next to me at Stadium Armory and continued to get more and more comfortable while reading his paper, practically smashing my face and body into the window. That only lasted until Metro Center where I was praying he would get off and have a serious crime occur (see yesterday) so he can see what being uncomfortable feels like.

I still need to figure out what the alleged suicide attempt was yesterday at Farragut North that had the L Street exit closed off. The only thing I can think is some woman was shopping at the VS on Connecticut Avenue and did not get the matching set she wanted and decided to take her life. VS has that effect on some…..well maybe just the DIE-hard shoppers.

~S~

Don't even THINK about petting me!!

The other day (Monday, actually, the day of the Empty ‘Chro), I saw an advertisement on the train that directed you to the WMATA website to check out a video on proper etiquette while riding the ‘Chro with service dogs (here it is: http://www.wmata.com/about/met_news/story.cfm?ID=522, just click on the link in the story). Now, while I think it’s great that the DVA is taking the initiative to educate the public, does this remind anyone other than me of the don’t-use-the-hair-dryer-in-the-bathtub warning? I mean, isn’t it pretty obvious that these dogs are performing a much needed service, and people should respect that? Think of that dog as a non-impaired person helping an impaired person – would you pet that person, or step on them as though they weren’t even there? I mean, c’mon…maybe the New Year’s resolution for half the people in this city (especially the ones in that video, for chrissake) should have been to become more aware of your surroundings. Granted, people sometimes put rude and inappropriate signs on their service dogs (the title of this post, for example, was a sign on a dog that H saw), but if it gets the point across to all the IDIOTS out there who take for granted the intelligence of those dogs, then more power to ‘em! R-E-S-P-E-C-T, dammit!

Ok, now on to a lighter topic – can you believe that WMATA is actually doing this: http://www.wmata.com/about/met_news/story.cfm?ID=526, or this article in the Post: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/01/03/AR2006010301541.html - you might have to *subscribe* to the online version of the Post, but it’s free, so shut the F up. I would love to enter this contest, but I threw away my Barbie™ tape recorder with the little microphone when I graduated from junior high. Also, there’s no way I would be able to keep it “polite, authoritative and serious” – I’d prolly be all like “Stand back, biatches, or the doors are gonna close on your ass! Y’all better recognize!” Or something like that…well, good luck to whomever enters, and I hope you don’t regret doing this and having to hear your voice everyday during your commute to work… I just feel sorry for Sandy, the woman whose voice they’ve been using for almost 10 years. Is she having a voice-retirement party? Maybe S could throw it for her – God knows she provides enough food at her parties to feed all of Southern Maryland…but you know I heart u, S, and the leftovers are always appreciated by a single chica on a limited income.

A final note: check out the intro to the WMATA website (use this link to see it – http://www.metroopensdoors.com/). Damn right it “opens doors to entertainment” – that pretty much justifies mine and S’s reasons for starting this blog! Hee hee...

Until tomorrow…
~B~

Do you know where my car is????

Ok due to the smarty-pants comments of a few I will get the ball rolling on metro riding again. Now granted I did not ride the infamous CHRO’ this morning, and after reading the Washington Post Metro Section Online – I felt the strong desire to comment on this and also voice my opinion as to why driving and steering clear of any public transportation may be a good idea for while….

Now, should you feel the urge as I did – this is very (um) informative as to where you DO and DO NOT want to catch the CHRO’ –

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/metro/interactives/metrocrime/

Fortunately for me – there has been no serious crimes or other incidents at the Morgan Blvd station (yet). I would have to go with my gut instinct that is would be partially in part to the fact that it is not the most easy to find station. Secondly, unless you are a Redskin, there is nothing around there except FedEx Field, trees and one neighborhood that looks like it could be a “guarded community” or it may just have the “guard shack” up as a theft deterrent and for looks.

Now on the other hand, should I happen to miss the opportunity to park at Morgan, I would generally drive on down Central Avenue a little to Addison Road. Statistics at the time of this Blog were as follows: 4 serious crimes reported by Metro, 2 by PG County Police, 22 stolen vehicles reported by Metro and 4 reported by PG County Police…uh, call me crazy but is appears that PG County Police are too busy preventing murders in that part of the county rather than writing up stolen vehicle reports. (Note to self – NEVER PARK THERE AGAIN)

I always assumed Benning Road was bad – now it seems that it is safer than Addison Road…..go figure.

Now let me move on to my choices of final destinations (weather permitting and depending on what shoes I have on that day). First, we have, McPherson Square; 4 serious crimes by Metro and 1 by DC Police. – Not terrible since I can see the only threat in that area being the people that live at the top of the escalators and they really do not appear to be able to do any harm, unless they have deadly weapons hidden in plastic bags or their stolen shopping carts, I think I will be ok. Lastly Farragut West – 4 serious crimes reported by Metro and 2 by DC Police.

In conclusion – WATCH YOUR BACK – you never know what will happen to you on the CHRO! (and one final thought – Stay away from Metro Center – they appear to have several un–reported serious crimes by DC Police)

~S~

Be Blessed in 2006……..

That’s what one of my church signs that I passed said this morning. Hey – I thought it was kinda amusing, like most of them are to me. It takes very little to amuse me in most cases. More later my little Disciples…..

~S~

My Fantasy Football :)

No pictures of Colorado to post, since I can’t find my Kodak Picture CD. I’m hoping I left it at S’s house – my hangover on Sunday prolly prevented me from gathering all my belongings (even though S did manage to sneak in a grocery-trip’s worth of food into my bag – thanks babe! The garlic bread is super-delicious!). I was witness to S’s face-plant – it was as though she was in slow-motion, very bizarre – and I did help her up, but b/c of my wine-infused drunkenness I just pushed her into the bathroom to clean up her lip herself – luckily, JJ came to the rescue. Sorry S – that wasn’t very nice of me. I think I was wondering why I didn’t have a drink in my hand, since I had all night…anyway, face deformity and all, S, you’ll always be beautiful to me. J The party was a big success, and our little S is quite the little hostess. Yay!

I can say that today I had a very pleasant ‘chro ride. The OC was practically a ghost-town, which was fine by me – I think it even made the heathens more pleasant, b/c I actually got a compliment on my new iPod case (thanks S, I heart my Kate!). However, the smooth commute ended when I got off at Farragut West and was obviously the only person who didn’t know that the 17th Street exit was closed, b/c it was a holiday. Oh, and I was also the only person who didn’t know it was a HOLIDAY. Jebus, wtf is wrong with me? I think I was still drunk this morning, so I blame some of it on that. Did I drink last night, you ask? No, but I think I drank enough on Saturday for it to be possible…I second S’s resolution #1.

Well, the college football season comes to a close on Wednesday night, and that’ll leave a HUGE hole in my Saturday afternoons/evenings. I am so happy that TCU managed to pull it off on Saturday – they nearly gave me a heart attack. Thank Jebus the NFL playoffs are this weekend, with games on Saturday. Ok, this is bad – I sound like a man, and that’s no way to land one now, is it?? How about this: I’m looking forward to having my Saturdays free to shop. Yeah…shop…that’s it…

Go Fightin’ Irish, Go West Virginia, Go Penn and Go Texas. I think that covers the BCS Bowls. Don’t ask about the NFL Playoffs – my team(s) don’t play this weekend, so I don’t really care - except for you, Carson Palmer – how come I’m just now noticing how HOT you are???!!!! Are you interested in an older woman? Yeah yeah, only by 2 months, but whatevs. What's with me and QBs??

I’m out – all this talk of Carson is too much, and I feel like I’m somehow cheating on Peyton. S’ok, I know I live in a dream world, but that’s the only way I maintain my sanity. Just ask my friends.

Word to your mutha.

B

Happy New Year…..or is it?

Hell yeah it is, regardless of the bloody lip and the mess I woke up to Sunday morning. It was all-good. This led me to confirm my resolution of not to drink a bottle of gin to have a good time. It’s pretty sad when you wake up and you have no clue why your face is bloody. Aside from that incident, I think everyone had a good time.


Since B did its my turn:

1. Stop drinking during the week or not to the point of inebriation – be able to at least take the sleep meds, Sunday through Thursday so I can function like a normal human being and not have to fill the world in on what Lifetime Movie was on at 3:00 AM.
2. Run the Cherry Blossom 10-miler in April as a training run for my next resolution.
3. Run the Rock and Roll Marathon in June for Team in Training and Katie! Great cause and for a wonderful person who touched the hearts of many people while she was with us.
4. Be a better friend and wife. Don’t take things for granted and appreciate the things you have and the people you care about.
5. Get my motorcycle and start riding (although this may not be a great idea before the marathon just in case – I would hate to hurt myself and not be able to run). What’s the point of having your motorcycle license and no bike…I have been trying to figure that out for months too.
6. And the petty thing – have a least a 4 pack again by the time I run this marathon and start eating better (again).

Happy New Year and I hope everyone had a safe and wonderful time. And I look forward to going back to work tomorrow – even though I was supposed to be there today but am too vain to go out in public with a fat lip. I figure tomorrow the swelling will have gone down enough to mask it with lipstick. Later!

~S~