New Year's Resolutions

Of course, it's a work in progress, but here's what I have so far:

1. Be a better listener (this has been an ongoing resolution, so please bear with me...I'm trying, I swear! I know I'll be a better friend to all my friends because of it!! I just wish I had my Tennessee Girl's memory...I miss my Huggs!!)
2. Run the Cherry Blossom 10-Mile in April
3. Run the Rock 'n Roll Marathon in San Diego in June (a band every mile AND a beer at the finish? That's a good time - it's my Bonnaroo for 2006) - it's for a great cause, and I'm super-psyched - thanks, JJ!! :)
4. Learn to LOVE children versus cowering in their presense - after all, I am due to become Aunt B in a matter of weeks! (no, not the one from Andy Griffith - I'll be soooooo much cooler)
5. Buy a house - as my little S says, "Don't be scurrd..." I've done better at budgeting my $$, and I really want to do this. No sense waiting for my Prince Charming before I jump into the real estate pond - maybe I was meant to be the Fun Single One of my friends!

Ok, that's all I have for now. I'm sure I'll add to it after the 1st. I'm excited for the NYE party S and JJ are having - I'll be spending it with my 4 goodest friends, and I'm so glad they'll ALL be there. :) I love you all, regardless of my behavior for the past few months.

Go Frogs and Go Donkeys!! I'll post tomorrow b4 the party, hopefully with at least a win for my Alma Mater!

Peace - B

P.S. - Colorado ROCKED! I'll post some pictures tomorrow (maybe)....

Friendship takes the effort of two people......

The best way to destroy an enemy is to make him a friend.-- Abraham Lincoln

One who looks for a friend without faults will have none. -- Hasidic Saying

True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost -- Charles Caleb Colton (1825)

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.-Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968)

~S~ - I should have done this initially when I posted last night.

Bore…….Bored……..Boring!

I should have guessed it would have been a dull day after it only took me 20 minutes to get to Largo – yes, you read right, Largo. No Morgan Blvd. today. I was actually able to park at Largo Town Center, on the 4th floor of the parking garage no less. Trust me – I was just as amazed as everyone else that was able to find a parking space there today. Well I guess the good thing is, I may get home faster that usual because there is no traffic. Possibly, the sooner I can get home to speed up my skin cancer process at the tanning salon and run 2 miles or attempt to as I did yesterday.

So actually yesterday was a good day – got up, ran 2 miles (I guess – I will have to ask my distance tracker AKA my husband the marathon man), cleaned up all the Christmas crap that was out, put it all away, did laundry, tried to clean the house and went to visit my husbands goddaughter. Then I was even feeling domestic so I made dinner. One that I actually was complimented on before my asking “so, honey, how is your dinner?” I was rather impressed with myself if I do say so. In addition, the best part is I refrained from drinking anything with alcohol in it so I could test out my Lunesta so I can see what getting sleep feels like again. Amazing I tell ya. I did not even have the urge to watch Lifetime or CNN in the middle of the night and that NEVER happens. Therefore, Lunesta it is. I heart sleep again. WOOO HOOO – watch out though this could only mean I will become even higher strung that I already am.

So my PIK is in Colorado playing the roll of Ski Bunny – so jealous but at least she took the time to send me an email. She is the bestest in the whole world and we cannot wait till she comes home! Miss ya B!

~S~

"All the riches, baby..."

"won't mean anything..." Ah, Gwennie - do you really mean that??? Because it sure meant a lot to the folks on my flight from D/FW to Vail. I've never seen that much collagen mixed with screaming kids in my LIFE. Granted, I should be used to it by now - I'm from that part of Colorado. However, those people aren't. Coloradans don't do collagen. The "family" occupying the 2 rows in front of me - both sides of the aisle - the row across from me, and the row behind me, for a grand total of 21 seats, were exhibiting the perfect example of why natives hate tourists. Up and down, up and down, Mama Designer Jeans (not unlike the $150 S purchased and returned in Vegas, I'm sure) was practically encouraging her brood to ignore the instructions from our flight attendants. The Jamacian nanny was of no help, just staring wide-eyed at the whole scene, but being yelled at by M.D.J. the whole flight for forgetting things. Grrr....and I had forgotten my damn iPod, and b/c of turbulance in the mountains, no beverage service - I couldn't even get drunk and forget about them. Grrr....but the flight did end, unfortunately without my luggage. Perfect end to a PERFECT day. (BTW - my luggage came in on another flight that afternoon, and it got to my parent's house in Glenwood Springs around 8pm - I know y'all were worried!)

Good Christmas - I got the one thing I asked for, my Pumas, and they are SUPER SWEET. I also got some other cool stuff too, like first editions of almost all the Nancy Drew books. Go ahead and say it, S and Boss Man - DORK. Going skiing the rest of the time I'm here - watch out all you touristas in Aspen, I'm gonna run you bitches over! - and drink my beloved Fat Tire Amber Ale, which I cannot get in the Commonwealth, or anywhere on the East Coast. Oh well. But if I was a rich girl...na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na....I'd have it flown in on my private jet, piloted by my Harijuku girls...

Big shout-outs to Jake the Snake (JJ, that was PAINFUL to type, fyi...) and Clinton Portis for their big wins on Saturday. I hope Jake doesn't blow it...but when they do lose to my Peyton, I will be sad. Peyton, don't be hatin' - that'll be the only time I'll root for another team over you. Promise. I'm gonna have your babies, after all...

Have a great work-week everyone! I'll be thinking of you while I'm on vaca in my beloved home state! BTW - here's a link to info about Glenwood Springs, if y'all are at all interested in my roots: http://www.ci.glenwood-springs.co.us/. Check out the Tourism link...the Hot Springs are stinky, but feel oh-so-good after skiing.

Lata suckas,
B

“The Freaks Come out at Night”….and in the morning.

No CHRO’ for me today, however I did have some driving experiences. I was not even 10 minutes from home and I spotted SANTA walking down 260. I tried to scope out the sleigh and reindeer to see if it had broken down but to no avail.

As I was making my way down Rt. 4 into the city– I spotted my George Clinton look-alike walking near the Marlo Furniture in Forestville. Only, today, to my surprise, he was dressed up like a NBA Player….WTF? Well sort of – lets just say I saw the “rebirth of the STARTER Jacket and outfit” this morning. He was proudly waving his bible as usual so I was not too taken aback.

Other than that, my ride was unusually pleasant this morning. My aggressive driving skills and techniques for weaving in and out of traffic have finally proved themselves. It only took me 45 minutes to get here. YAY ME!

~S~

A monster has been created.....

uh oh.....

We must seem like we are HIGH MAINTENANCE....oops

DCDivas' Wish List

It's all about the accessories this year!!

4 Days & Counting…

Christmas is sneaking up on us! My legs felt like icicles this morning as I was walking from my warm car (nicely heated up to 90 degrees according to the thermostat) to the Morgan Blvd. Station to go stand there and wait for the BBB to show up.

I managed to get on a 4 car train (lucky me) that was having some issues coming to a complete stop as it hurled people around and jerked to a stop. Normally, I would be OK with this, however, not on a packed 4-car train. Did I mention that almost everyone was carrying presents? That just makes it worse. Someone forgot to send me the “Santa Memo” because I left mine at home (good thing too because some of them are alcoholic and I probably would have tapped into them). So I get off at McPherson Square to be greeted by the overly friendly EXPRESS Newspaper man who insists on getting in your face everyday and smiling as he is trying to shove you yet another newspaper. Sorry pal, I already threw mine away. I think from now on I will save it and give it back to him so he gets the point. I also noticed this morning that the same guy that was standing at the top of the escalators yesterday was there again in the same position. One of two things is happening here. He is frozen in that position OR he has taken up residency at Vermont and I. I think it is the latter.

I contemplated driving today but chose not to since I have dinner with the in-laws and their company tonight, and driving would put me home even later than the CHOR' if I leave at 5:30. Besides, this is my last BBB ride until next Tuesday when I return to work. Driving in tomorrow so I can go eat dinner with my girls (compliments of a very nice attorney - T.B.)! Should be an adventure….hopefully I will not have to use any spare quarters on the way home (inside joke). I promise I will be extremely careful and no drinking and driving.

I suppose I will work on concocting the Green Bean Casserole that my mother has insisted that I make instead of cheesecake for Christmas dinner. Should be a memorable event with our “vegetarian dishes and root vegetables” – Don’t ask. We were all specifically instructed to bring something and then she proceeded to give us the rest of the menu in the invite, which sounds like something off the Food Network. Maybe I will refer to her as “Rachel Ray” instead of “Mom” that day – BUT ONLY if she can do it for “$40 a Day” or make it a “30-Minute Meal”

Ok I am out. More later!

~S~

Day Two

So I felt guilty riding the ‘chro this morning (even after Puffy Coat Girl stuck her coat all up in my face…grrr). I’m still in shock over the strike in New York. Can you even imagine fighting for a cab in NYC right now?? And now, after the city announced the $1M fine per day against the union, the union is planning to appeal, calling the penalty “excessive” (source: The Express, baby!!). Do you mean to tell me they have the NERVE to shout “excessive”? What the F do you call a strike that strands thousands of commuters in one of the largest cities in the world? Um, un-excessive? (I’m sure that’s not a word, but I couldn’t think of anything else – blogger’s-block!) Jebus – I’m glad the union has all that time to put forth an appeal. Good thing they don’t have to deal with the strike or anything…ok, no more, I promise. Just needed a little soap-box time on public transportation.

But speaking of New York, I read to my complete surprise that my beloved Yankees may be acquiring Johnny Damon (I call him Jesus, b/c of the beard…) of the Red Sox. What the?? I guess I’m living in an alternate universe by thinking that loyalty still matters in sports. Silly me, how could I forget that money is the only thing that matters!!! But I should already know that, since I heart the Yankees, right MB?? :)

Sorry for the lack of Orange Crush reports – nothing worth talking about. But I figured I should say something, because I wouldn’t want any of y’all to forget about me!

Peace and hairgrease,

B

The Exciting Life

Yes folks, I'm living it. That's why I haven't posted in a while...wait, no. I haven't posted because I have nothing to post. The 'Chro has been dull - same ol', same ol'. I must, however, extend my condolences to the subway and bus riders of NYC. I can't even IMAGINE what they're going through right now - but I'm sure the cabbies are LOVIN' IT! They prolly have bumper stickers that say "Strikes Rule!!" Kudos, New York. I'm sure DC would have a panic-attack and shut down, even though Anthony Williams would call us a bunch of p*ssies - I heart him, he's such a stud. Ok, sorry, I'm all over the board today.

Speaking of, I spent my morning putting together a Cube (pictured above). Yes. That's what I do now. Play. I'm sure you're all out there saying, "Why the F are you complaining?" (Which is what I would say to the Transit workers in NYC...) But c'mon - 2 degrees to end up playing with plastic toys?? Hey, but I can say I do like the stickers that came with it: "This isn't a job, it's hell with flourescent lights." HA HA HA HA HA Anywho, I hope to have more exciting stories in the next few days, before I leave to celebrate the holidays with the fam damily in Colorado. If not, I ALWAYS have a good plane-ride story...no, nothing to do with the Mile-High Club (get your mind out of the gutter, Boss Man!).

Ta-ta for now, my lovelies...

B

Little Drummer Boy (Err….I Mean Girl?)

I will begin with my ride home last night on the BBB. At the Metro Center Station, this somewhat crazed man charged (literally) onto the train, ripped off his yellow puffy coat and proceeded to read the Business Section of the Washington Post until he departed at Benning Road. As he read his Business Section (potential Stock Broker??...Numbers make me crazy too) he began rocking back and forth and singing while dancing with the newspaper. Very odd. Must be the cold weather.

This morning, I had the pleasure of sitting next to a woman who was playing the (air) drums that Metro provides for its customers with portable MP3 and CD Players. Wish my iPod got me jumpin’ that much in the morning. I knew I was getting old (grrr….January is getting closer as we speak) when I wanted to turn to her and ask her to sit still, like a child.

Gotta finish some last minute Christmas shopping sometime this week. Not looking forward to that at all. I am sure that will be the subject of some of my next encounters. Have a wonderful day. I am sure there will be more on my way home.

~S~

Tis the season……

Not a metro story but just felt like writing. I am trying to figure out why the holidays make people crazy. I was reading the paper this morning and two things grabbed my attention. The man that killed his 63-year-old wife and then shot himself (he was 58). Now I know that women can be a pain in the ass, trust me I am a pain in the ass (at least I can admit it). And I am fairly sure my husband loves me enough not to kill me, although he has said he was going to beat me (can you blame him?). But for Christ’s sake – this guy could have at least waited until after the New Year. Why fuck up the holidays for everyone. Just fuck up the New Year. Decide that should be your resolution and bring the New Year in with a bang. HA…ok not funny.
The second little news tid bit that stood out to me was the guy who took his box cutter into CVS in Annapolis and stole 500 bottles of Body Wash. It looks like someone needed to do a little last minute Christmas shopping (aka, thieving?) and was getting stocking stuffers. What gets me is it was CVS brand…. come on now, why the hell do you think they have Bath and Body Works and the Body Shop. Believe me, I am not condoning theft but I used to work at Express which had a Bath and Body Works attached and you saw people steal that stuff all the time. Go threaten a Limited employee with a box cutter – bet she will let you take whatever you want.
Ok, now I am scaring myself. I don’t want to turn into a “CHRISTMAS CRAZY” myself. Need to finish up some last minute shopping today for my wonderful husband (no, sorry honey, I want that plasma as much as you do but we will have to wait. I also thought about surprising you with a motorcycle but we have nowhere to put that either, so we will just have to get our bikes together in the spring).
I guess I will just have to suck it up and pay the exorbitant amount of online shipping – but who cares – better late than never. I also have to do Christmas cards, now that the majority of mine came in I know who to send them too (ha!). So I am out. More tomorrow. Mondays on the Metro is always an adventure.

~S~

My boyfriend.....

He's so nice! I hope we run into eachother again sometime pal!



~S~

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words…..

…….and this one describe it all. Happy Friday everyone. I was lucky enough o find a good parking space at Morgan Bldv., Alan gave me my newspaper and told me to have a nice weekend, and then it all went downhill (well actually that happened this morning when my husband told me I smelled like a bottle of liquor). Screaming kids….all the way to L’Enfant Plaza, a girl with runny pantyhose and kid with Tupac Jeans (literally he was on there like a shrine or something…anyone think I should become the fashion police?) and for the second day in a row, I ran into and ran away from people that I went to either middle school or high school with. WTF! I thought I was the only one in this city that grew up in the area and stayed. Apparently not. It happens to me all the time. I managed to turn the other way and play dumb – I have nothing to say to anyone that I went to school with – except “thanks for making my life miserable and for the petty arguments between girls who were supposed to be best friends and I am sorry I didn’t bitch slap you when I had the chance”.

This leads me into my next story about the hooch at M&S last night at the table behind us. She was about to get stomped herself compliments of me and the bottle of gin that I probably drank at the “Holiday Party” (we must be politically correct as to not offend anyone). She insisted on being a petty bitch and acting like a 2 – year old. WAIT! That would have been me had I gotten into a bar fight. Anyhow, she got lucky – in the spirit of the holiday and against “M.B’s.” wishes and instigating comments, I left her alone. She will forever be referred to as the “Fat Bitch” even if she was not – hee hee. I also had a run in with Jim Vance from Channel 4 (11:00 PM News my friends!) – What a nice man. The lesson learned from that run in was do not call your brother who is a recovering alcoholic and tell him you met Jim Vance (in a bar) who is also recovering from something. You will get hung up on.

Ok I need to get back to work – now that the magnet mystery is solved – thanks Sheila for pointing them out this morning…..didn’t think I made it all the way back across the office to place them in H’s office. More later I am sure I will think of something since it has not been work since arrived.

P.S. forgive the rambling…..the Starbucks coffee is making me jumpy…

~S~

Liar Liar……

So I was too tired last night to think of any Vegas stories. So while I am sitting here waiting for “T” to come in I will give you some highlights. $150 dollar jeans, onion rings and A-1 sauce, Firey Hot Cheetos, Sushi, two bottles of cheap wine and red and black on the roulette table....thats all you need to know. (Can't forget the 4 AM party on Monday morning next door)

~S~

Um……anyone care to analyze?

My Horoscope For Today (Capricorn)

As you take another step upwards today, “S”, you may suddenly realize that there is a large portion of the mountain that you had previously unaccounted for. Perhaps this steep portion of the climb was not visible from below, where you started the trip. Do not panic. By overreacting to the unknown you may lose your balance and go sliding down the face of the mountain. Instead, collect yourself, rest, and plan your strategy one stop at a time.

BTW – I am back. I will be posting stories from Vegas as soon as I can remember them all. No internet in the room – well there was for a gazillion dollars so I decided not to pay the money.

I will try to compile tonight.


~S~

A Gentle Reminder...

(I meant to post last night, but I had some, er, doggies to tend to…) I must say I am very disappointed in my experience on the Soul Train yesterday. Other than a bit of traffic to Morgan, nothing exciting. Unfortunately, I’m not as talented as S in being able to read the church signs as I drive by – my luck, I would rear-end somebody. Yeah, I’m not a very good driver. One weird thing on the BBB – nobody wanted to sit next to me during the morning commute, but it was one right after the other sitting next to me on the way back, and this was even with fully-open benches. WTF? Do I look better at night? No wonder I never get taken on any lunch dates…

I drove into the city this morning – I didn’t want to leave a car full o’ crap at the metro station, even though that would’ve been more in my price range (btw, sooooo glad Thursday is PAYDAY). Lots of horn-honking, which really does no good, let’s face it. I only honk my horn to let someone know I’m coming out of a blind spot – like the alley where I buy my crack cocaine. Everyone just tunes out the horn-honking any other time, so why even bother?? I prefer to make obscene hand gestures, unless I’m in unfamiliar territory, because who knows who will get out of a car with a gun the size of MY car??!! Usually, I just cuss up a storm in the privacy of my own car, which I feel sends negative vibes to the person/car pissing me off. Passive-aggressive, that’s me!!!

My stay in So. MD has been lovely – I just heart the Bay Area – but I’m excited to be going back to my little place. I’m sure we’ll all be hearing about Vegas from my Partner In Crime for a few days – something about a cowboy convention and the strong desire to steal a plasma TV?!! Should make for some interesting posts!! We missed you, S!!

B

Drinkin' and Drivin'

What exactly is this picture telling you NOT to do? "Don't drink martinis and get chaufferred around in your limo!"?? Silly Google Images...

Happy Saturday, everyone! Just kickin' it here at S & JJ's house for the weekend - btw guys, the boys are behaving WONDERFULLY, no troubles at all. No 'chro this weekend, but I have been lucky enough to experience the driving techniques of the folks in So. MD - I must say, you're all excellent drunk drivers. Seriously. I went out last night to see Kadee's band play in Deale (#2 on my list of favorite MD town names. #1?? Mayo, of course). S was impressed that I made it to Deale on my own - Kadee gives great directions. I didn't drink too much, since I was afraid of getting lost on the way back and was soooo not in the mood for that - or for getting a DUI/DWI, whatever you get in MD. So I was able to watch a few peeps stumble out of the bar, and get behind the wheel of their car. I pulled out behind them, and was surprised at how well they drive drunk. No joke - I'm not trying to make light of it, really. It's just that I've been trying to master the driving drunk thing for a few years now, only to give up because I preferred taking the 'chro. These people have given me new hope - it CAN be done. Maybe when I move out here, I'll have more time to perfect this golden skill (since beers are only $3, or $2.50 if you get lucky).

Went to the small grocery store this afternoon, Roland's. Oh, and they have a liquor store in the grocery store too - BRILLIANT. That's really all I wanted to say about Roland's.

Well, I'm sure I'll have stories on Monday, since I'll be making the commute on the BBB that day (hopefully from Morgan Blvd - not sure I'm ready for the ghetto of Addison). Stay tuned!

B

Vegas Here I Come!

So I want to take this opportunity while I am waiting for my husband to pack (we are leaving in an hour and he still needs to pack. I am guilty though also. I packed this morning, although for me that’s a tedious process, thank god my suitcase is huge and I was able to fit 10 pairs of shoes and three purses in there to go with the numerous outfits) to thank “B” aka "Partner in Crime" for watching my babies while I am gone. They promised me this morning that they will stop eating the ornaments off the tree and stop unwrapping gifts so you wouldn’t have to beat them while we were gone. Also be forewarned that Finnegan was told if he was bad he was going to go live with you. He already threw up the glitter ornaments he ate during the past week as a going away gift to “JJ” and I. Jackson said he will try to keep that jackass in line; and promised he would be fine.


We will keep everyone posted on if we win. Hopefully everything I learned in “Bringing Down the House” will come rushing back to me so I will win big at blackjack.


Adios…. ~S~

Wacky Wednesday!

My question of the day (and I just may have to research this) is……does the District of Columbia Public School System provide buses for the heathens that I ride with in the morning? I do not know what they are teaching them, vocabulary-wise, however I do know that “FUCK” must be on every spelling test given in third through sixth grade. It was so bad amongst these three (maybe middle school) kids that some man repeatedly asked them to “please stop cursing for a little bit” which in turn caused them to became even more belligerent and start saying it over and over again. At some point the conversation finally turned to how someone’s mother cannot stop “havin babies” and “she need to stop cuz she don’t take care of them”. That conversation led to one of the boys (I was trying not to stare – thank god they were sitting behind me) to start talking about how he was going to go to his fathers this weekend and get his check and if he didn’t have it he would stomp him. OMG….WTF is all I have to say.

This one is for you “B” – You would have had a heart attack when the 3.5” midget stepped on the train at Metro Center. HA. I wanted to text you but I would have fallen over because I decided to stand up at L’EnFante Plaza because the woman next to me (I will refer to her as Octopus – wanted to get off). Sad thing was I deliberately sat next to her because I thought she would be one that would be uncomfortable. Little does she know – she now has been given a nickname. Moreover, her arms extending all over the seat and it did not bother me one bit – HA HA HA – yeah right. I did it to myself. I always get squished by big women. They see the tiny little girl and decide that it is ok to sit down (or on) me.

Lastly, (not Chro’ related) as I was walking up K Street this morning, my favorite bum (well I have lots of favorites , but for today…) was flailing his hands wildly in the air because he heard sirens. I almost lost my Starbucks. This leads me to believe that he was traumatized as a child and is having posttraumatic stress disorder. Must have involved sirens. OUT!

~S~

You'll shoot your eye out, kid

DC peeps crack me up – they don’t know what to do in bad weather. They look at snow like it’s some foreign object from Pluto, or worse, West Virginia. Perfect example was this morning, as I was walking to C-house – yes, I was cold, but I grew up in Colorado so I’m not allowed to bitch. I saw a man walking his dog, wearing a snowsuit – yes, a snowsuit, with the puffy legs and arms, like the kid in “A Christmas Story” (remember Randy? “I can’t put my arms down!” HA). I laughed out loud, but don’t worry, the insulation from his suit muffeled my laughter.

I proceeded into the C-house station, and as I made my way down to the platform, I encountered a whole mess ‘o people. Shiznit – that meant a delay. I looked up at the marquee thingy that lists the time before the next train, and dammit if that wasn’t the longest 5 minutes I’ve waited for a train. Why do they even put the time up there if it’s not accurate?? Whatevs. Train #1 came – I stood out of the way to avoid being trampled, because the crazy Arlingtonians WILL kill anything in their path to get on a train (S will affirm this – I’ve only made her ride into work from my house once, and I’m sure she’ll never do it again!). As I watched a tiny girl of the Asian Persuasion cram her way on between some guy’s legs as the doors closed, I sighed. Train #2 approached – same scenario, except this time, a man walked away from the crammed train throwing out expletives – I swear, tourrettes, no lie.

As Train #3 approached, it appeared fairly empty, so I boarded this time. Except there was a woman in a wheelchair near the doors with a dog. Help me out – why the dog too? She was reading – not Braille – so I don’t think she was blind. Anyways, she was close to the door on the opposite side, and her dog was on her left side, by the door. Some A**HOLE squeezed his way around me to be in that space, practically stepping on the poor dog. Punk. Then, when the train stopped at FogBot, a guy with crutches hobbled off the train – WTF, was I riding the ShortTrain to work?? Tourrettes, wheelchair, crutches – all on my train. It was a doozy, folks.

Well, here’s to hoping that a workout will pass enough time for me to avoid the rush after work. Regardless, I’m sure there will be a story to tell. Stay tuned, my little monkeys!

B

I hate snow….and rude people!

So my wonderful boss tells me that he understands that I may have to leave early today because he is aware of where I live because he docks his sailboat here. So I manage to make it through the day. Nice “HUGE” lunch at Café Asia with my “partner in crime” and then I managed to finish hours and hours of dictation for a chapter of a book that he is writing. So finally, I tell him that one of our clients is crazy and I want to go home. He laughs, and tells me to go home and play in the snow tonight and all day tomorrow. I take that as….. “S” just hang out in So. Maryland tomorrow and give DC a try Wed. I tell him no…. “Hey T, I am going to try to be in tomorrow since I will be abandoning you Friday through next Wednesday when I am playing in Vegas (stories to come while I am gone….I am sure – since my husband and I will both probably take our laptops). So anyhow, I mosey on outta the good place of employment at 5:00 PM instead of the normal 5:30 or later since I am an awesome legal assistant who was told to praise herself as much as she wants on her review she has to fill out (GAY!)….walk to Farragut and end up waiting for 10 minutes for the BBB. WTF….oh wait it gets better, once it does come(everyone in DC must ride that train at that time because I literally had to force my way onto the train), I tried to let some nice gentleman that had been waiting since the last Orange Crush came with me but he was about as frustrated as I was. No way in hell anyone was letting him on….and he was even nice enough to let women on first! He decided to wait it out another 10 minutes for the next BBB. I am sure he was thinking “BITCHES” the entire time. Well consider me one because - screw that shit…I was on. I tried and I was not waiting. I am tired of being nice. No more Mrs. Nice Girl. So I hold out bobbing my way back and forth to Metro Center and finally get a seat. I would like to thank Jane Magazine for featuring Joaquin Phoenix this month….love him. But not as much as I love my “JJ”. (He has his Jessica Simpson and Kelly Clarkson and I have my Joaquin. And Eminem….what can I say – we are strange).

Literally it was nuts – all the way to MB where I got off….standing room only. I think it would only be appropriate to thank Metro for making sure that I did not break my neck while walking to my car. I will be sure to pack snowshoes in the future or skis because that is how slippery it was as the fancy little snow plows and salt tractors sat under the awning barely touched. ROCK ON METRO…I heart you…. its now confirmed!

~S~

HA!

http://wtop.com/?nid=30&sid=636563 ……That has got to be the most hilarious thing I have read in awhile. Now for those of you that know me, you are well aware that I have a slight case of tourettes and I generally say what’s on my mind. So that being said – WTF is Metro thinking. This is great - "We're trying to get people not to block the doors - even when the platform is crowded," ok Jimbo….you must have a f’ing PhD and drive your CLK Mercedes to the Metro headquarters, wherever they may be and not ride the CHRO. That has got to be the most asinine thing I have read in awhile. Great, put up new signs and have some announcer try to speed up passengers, oh yeah and not to mention that this will probably cause a raise in the prices to ride because they have to pay for this nonsense somehow. First of all, how many of us actually pay attention to what they are saying. Not me. The only one that gets my attention is the announcement to watch for suspicious packages and that one doesn’t even get me anymore. Secondly, look at the jackasses that ride the metro, now this may be mean but how many of them do you think are literate? Not many on my line. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt but good lord, when you are speaking in Ebonics – what the hell makes you think they can read. Last I checked there was not an Ebonics encyclopedia. Now let me say this – I am only speaking of the kids. There are a ton of professionals that ride the BBB with me, but I also get the kids that go from Benning Road to wherever it is they go during the day (lets hope its not school – that would be just as bad as PG County Schools which I don’t like to tell people that I am a proud graduate of – for fear that I will be expected to speak in Ebonics).
http://www.wmata.com/about/met_news/story.cfm?ID=494 ……here’s another. Now I know I said that I may try to ride this weekend and I even had plans on Sunday to go with my husband to visit my partner in crime but we will be driving. Sorry guys – I am not in the mood for delays on the weekend considering I deal with them daily. The herky jerky of the train for several stops because somehow they get backed up but are still cram packed. I swear I have whiplash. Do you think I could file a claim for that?

~S~

Wow, Billy Shatner was quite the dashing young man...

There's just nothing like sweating your buns off (wait...nope, still there! sorry...) on the elliptical, walking down to the platform, being smashed into people before you get on the train, and have coffee spilled on you. Yes, this happened to me about an hour ago at good ol' FarraGUT W. To make matters worse, that lovely little voice did come on to tell us what the delay was...IN SPANISH. Not sure how long I waited, but started to get even more impatient as coffee was spilled on me for the second time. Yes, the man standing directly in front of me speaking very loudly to impress the girl he was with in what I can ONLY assume was a fake British accent spilled coffee on me for the second time - he likes gesturing wildly with his hands, I noticed a little too late in the game.

Once I finally got on the OC, I was positioned directly behind a girl with her hair done up in some elaborate bun with chopsticks poking out of it, about 2 inches from my face. She was sort of rocking back and forth, so I nearly lost an eye - kinda would've been cool to be a pirate though...damn...Then the train stopped at FogBot (that's slang for Foggy Bottom, according to the kids) where the train was crammed even more so. These 3 jackasses were right next to me, the one talking very loudly directly into my ear, for no reason at all - I sniffed for alcohol, but they appeared to be sober (in smell, anyway). I think it was a I-can-pull-more-Star-Trek-references-out-of-my-ass-than-you-can contest, because that's all they were talking about. Shame, really - one of them was kinda cute, but one of my rules is that I must be the bigger dork - he needs to be ashamed of ME, not the other way around...anyways, I almost didn't make it off at C-house and I had to shove a woman out of the way trying to get on before I could get off. She muttered "Bitch" under her breath, but instead of pulling a S (heart u) and flattening her to the ground, I simply kept on walking, thinking only of the beer awaiting me in my fridge. Ah, Yuengling - how can you be so cheap AND so good?? Here's to you, my little Trekkie!

B

I’m alive…..

Thank god. There were no crazy women commenting on my matching shoes, purse and Ann Taylor skirt and no one tried to jump me for my Smart Trip card or ipod that my wonderful husband bought me so I would stop bitching. So I will end with this…. I am forced to take another 4-day weekend and use my vacation days. I will be spending my time with my babies (two beautiful boxers (pictured) – one which is sound asleep on my leg at this moment - and my man.). Hope everyone has a great weekend and we will try to ride if we can.

Night!
S

...next to Godliness...

I've always been impressed with how clean (most of) the metro stations are, and the metro itself - well, minus the puke-stained carpet and the occasional 40 rolling around. Perfect example: this morning, as I was heading down the first round of escalators at C-house (Courthouse, in case you aren't aware...), I saw a man walking down one escalator cleaning the handrails. No lie. I saw the cleaning products at the bottom of the escalator, sitting on the metal separator - Ajax, Windex, a couple of cloths. At first, I thought he was a homeless man being nice - hey, some of them are really nice, like the guy outside the CVS on Connecticut who always says thank you and God Bless You even if you don't give him any money - but as a turned to gawk (as I've mentioned before, I don't really have much tact) I saw he was wearing the required blue jumpsuit with the Metro insignia. How wonderful - Metro is actually taking a little pride in their escalators. Well, I'll say that and really mean it when I go a day without seeing a "broken" escalator - it's not a ride, people! Jebus...

On a different note, I saw a VERY good-looking boy on the OC (fyi - they're all boys until they prove to me otherwise). He stood right next to me, bumped into me a couple of times, smiled in apology. Aww...he had bootiful blue eyes and a small tuft of white hair on his right sideburn - no, I wasn't committing his looks to memory or anything...but no matter, the boys in my area are too G-town and G-dub - why can't they be REAL, like the boys from Maryland (that one's for you, JJ!!)?!

Ok, speaking of JJ, I have to give my little S a shout - hope she didn't have to gat someone tonight at Addison. She is quite the little G, which is for GANGSTA.

Bye bye from Honky-Town -
B

Soul Train…….AKA........BBB

Now I usually would not knock the BBB because it is one of my modes of transportation to work, however this morning I arrived at the Morgan Boulevard Station 5 minutes later than usual and guess what…..the last damn parking space in the whole station which is about as wide as a crack in the wall was taken by the big ass Suburban that cut me off at the light to get around me. Dumb bitch…I was hot. How she got that monster truck in there, I do not know, but she managed.

I ended up going to Addison Road…..lets just say I will not be working out or happy houring after work today. I will spend my lunch looking for somewhere to purchase mace and brass knuckles and quiet possibly a stun gun. Normally I would not be bothered by parking there but it will be pitch black when I get off the train, that station is not very well lit and I had to park at the top of the parking garage. At least I found a space close to the stairs so I can sprint to my car when I get out of the stairwell. I do not know what it is but this station makes me more nervous than when I was parking at the Legend Nightclub and riding the Mean Green from Naylor Road. I would have to say I am not sure which is more ghetto. One thing is for sure, if you don’t hear from me tomorrow, you will know why.

I am sure I will have more train stories for you later if I make it home alive so stay tuned!

~S~

Lisa Bonet and George Clinton????

My apologies for not posting yesterday. Was a very busy day, even more so than usual since we had a 4-day weekend. The day started with my forgetting where my stupid Smart Trip card was. I knew it was in one of my gazillion coats that I wore Wednesday, but that was 4 days prior – how the hell was I supposed to remember which coat it was that I was wearing?? At any rate, it dawned on me as I was 15 minutes from home that I was wearing the brown coat (I used my fuzzy memory to run through 4 days of outfits – some days more than one outfit, and finally settled on the light pink twin set and plaid Ann Taylor pants that I had worn – being that they were brown and I had brown shoes in this made complete sense). So I get to the metro station and I am now the proud owner of 2 count it ; 2 Smart Trip Cards….Thanks Metro for attempting to hold my car hostage since you will not let me leave the lot unless I have the friggin piece of plastic.

So on to my train experience; all rides were quite pleasant yesterday. I got to see my buddy Alan in the morning and then had the pleasure of sitting next to Lisa Bonet’s look alike. I kid you not – this girl could have been a double on the Cosby Show. The ride from Morgan Boulevard to McPherson Square on the BBB ( I needed fresh air) went exceedingly well. There we no odd smells or strange incidents to report.

The ride home went just as well, probably because I did not feel well and I turned up my ipod, got into my book, and ignored everyone around me. Not until I reached my destination did I remember that I was supposed to be silently observing the actions of metro-goers…oops.

This morning – my George Clinton look alike that I mentioned previously had made his way further down Route 4 and has established residency closer to the way I commute every morning. He was hitchhiking this time, maybe he decided that country life was not for him and wanted to head back to MD’s murder capital – Good Ol’ P.G County – and don’t’ knock it because I was raised there and will put a gat in yo ass…..

Gotta go back to work – since technically that is what I am here to do. LATA!

~S~

Walk the Orange Line, Biatches

Ok, let me just get it out of the way - GO SEE THIS MOVIE. It's got all my favorite things - love, drugs, music, boozin'...ok, maybe just the last 3 things are my faves, but seriously, it's great. I heart Joaquin and Reese <3 <3

I decided to take the 'chro back home, since it was dark after the movie and I'm afraid of the dark. I'm sure this is the only time I will be able to say this, so savor it with me, won't you:
There was nobody on OC (well, maybe not NOBODY, but you know what I mean...). I actually got a seat (pointless, really, since I only had 3 stops to go...lazy-ass...). However, sitting directly across from me was the Queen of the Trailer Park. Seriously. I don't like to make fun or call people names (wait, YES I do!!), but she was straight-up outta the Park. Her eyeliner was smeared all down her cheeks, she had on tapered(!!) jeans and black shoes that appeared to be heels. To make matters worse, she wouldn't stop staring at me. I scare easily (just ask S and JJ - damn "Saw"...), so I was just waiting for her to jump me for my fake Kate and Nine Wests. To my relief, she got off at VA Square, stumbling her way to the escalator. No lie, I watched her. But anyways, maybe she was staring at me because she'd never seen a clean person before, or maybe because I don't look like one of Poison's groupies on the way home from the night before (no offense to Poision - I heart u, Bret!).

So, not the most exciting trip, but gimmie a break, biatches - it's Sunday, what do you expect? Hope you all went to church - catch ya lates!

B

Mystery Smell??????????

Was it just me or was there a mystery smell on the trains and in the stations this morning. Could have just been the train I was on, but it smelled like fuel. Which in turn I (actually my vivid imagination) turned into explosives. Then I started to pick out the suspects and take a careful look at my surroundings (suspicious packages and people that looked nervous and out of place) in case I made it through the blast that was going to blow up the BBB this morning. Anyhow, it made for an interesting ride and now my nose is burning from the “Mysterious Stench”.

I will end the entry with this – I am going to dig out my flute that my mother still has from when I played in elementary school and kill time before work at the top of the escalators playing random (made-up) songs with a hat at my feet. Donations (in the paper form with little heads on it - please) will be accepted. My Starbucks habit is starting to get costly. I could smoke cigarettes for cheaper than a Venti hot water with two teas bags (5 days a week).

Have a Happy Turkey Day everyone. I am sure I will come back with some kind of family related madness that occurred over turkey, stuffing and cranberry sauce and *lots of desserts*.

~S~

That's it

I've had it. No more. I speak of apologizing for bumping into my fellow 'chro riders. This morning, I boarded the pack-'em-in-like-sardines-OC, and was pushed, literally, from behind into a small little person on the other side of the train. I said "OMG - I'm sorry!" and kind of gave a "It's the muddaf-ers behind me" shrug. She smirked, looked me up and down, SMIRKED AGAIN (!!), and turned back around. Beeyatch! Excuse me, but I look cute today, and secondly, I said sorry. So, I made it a point to shuffle my Express in her ear the entire commute - I mean, I prolly could've rested the damned thing on top of her head (don't worry, S, that's not a slam to shorties like you - this beeyatch deserves to be hated on), but I decided that would just be too cruel and unusual. Unfortunately, I noticed that my antics were not winning me any points with the Jude Law-lookalike next to me - whatevs, he's probably a busta like Jude anyways... As I got off the train, I tripped (read: I am Clumsy Clara, seriously) right into Hot Guy #2 for the morning - once again, I said "Sorry 'bout that," and this one looked at me like I had just spoken Eskimo, turned and walked away!! Argh!!

So, in conclusion, I will no longer be apologizing for my unintentional offenses - but I will apologize now for not being able to stick to this promise, since my good manners will probably force me to apologize anyway. A simple "It's ok," "No problem," or even a simple nod-in-recognition is all I ask for. But I guess courtesy is foreign in this city, just like the Eskimo language...

I still love you all (despite this...),
B

I heart Alan….(not lierally)

Alan is my VERY FRIENDLY Metro Express newspaper distributor at Morgan Boulevard - where I catch the BBB. He always has my paper folded in half and waiting as he sees me approach, always has a smile on his face and always tells me to have a great day. Alan deserves a raise. I think I will get him a nice warm pair of gloves for Christmas so he can keep his hands toasty and not miss work due to pneumonia from standing outside in the morning. A day without Alan would be terrible. ~~~ S~~~~

It's official...

...I am a dork. I went on my lunch break to get a ticket for the new Harry Potter movie. Luckily for y'all, I took Orange Crush, in hopes of scoring a sweet story for your entertainment (as mentioned by her in an entry earlier today, my partner in crime and I drove to our glorious place of employment today).

First off, Glamour Shots: never understood 'em. However, I seriously thought about asking their poster model, who was on the OC with me. Daaaaaaamn - I've never seen anyone apply so much makeup in one sitting - and I was in a sorority...I was patiently awaiting the application of Aqua Net - I used to live and die by that big beautiful aerosol can - but I was let down. Sitting across the aisle from Glamour Gal was Mr. Fussy - he had that nervous twitch that a lot of guys have of tapping their toe, their leg shaking uncontrollably. This kid took it to a whole new level - his leg was moving as though independent of his body.

On my way back from satisfying my dork gene (those of you who know me will probably say "It's plural, B - GENES"), as I was stepping off the escalator at my stop for work, a man with a briefcase, wearing a suit, stopped at the top of the escalator. Yes. He stopped. Dead stand-still. He was standing in the middle, so I had to tap his shoulder, "Excuse me," to get around him. Now, I've received dirty looks before, but this one would've made Dick Cheney cry - even I was on the verge of tears. He seemed thoroughly annoyed that I had DARED to excuse myself. Jebus...next time I'll just shove my way around you, hopefully knocking that Coach "Man-Bag" out of your hand. Ah, DC men - I LOVE YOU!!

Have a great 3-day week everyone!! (and if you don't have a 3-day week - SUCKS TO BE YOU)

B

Oh yeah.....get ready!

http://wtop.com/index.php?nid=25&sid=627767 - the fun is about to begin.

On Hiatus from the Chro’ since last Wednesday

I am sad, so sad that I actually thought about riding it during lunch for entertainment purposes. I could always “miss the bus” tonight and make someone pick me up at the station. I feel like I have lost a friend - HA!

Ok so not really, but seriously, driving is almost slightly as entertaining as taking the BBB. Especially when you are with your partner in crime and she hates driving. As we made our trek down Pennsylvania Avenue (Rt. 4), we encountered our new place of worship - The Church of Jesus Christ, Inc. Now the sign says we will be celebrating their 75 anniversary (this Sunday) of being a place of worship, although it perplexed me that they would have been “Incorporated” that long. Maybe they needed to snatch up the name before the Church of Jesus Christ, LLC or Corp. stepped to the plate and filed and Articles of Incorporation with DC.

Next we move onto – the Millions More Movement (*Coming Soon*) No actually it was October 15th. Over a month ago. Someone needs to call the Muhammad #4 church and tell them to remove their sign. I do not like to be confused so early in the morning or better yet get my hopes up for something that has already passed.

Third, there was a nice African American gentleman walking on PA. Ave. in S.E. wearing jeans and a jacket and carrying his shiny golf club. First thing that ran through my mind was “I didn’t realize Southeast had country clubs". Maybe there is one there I could afford to join so I could take up golfing.

And last but certainly not least; (I still have to make my way out at lunch to pick up my shoes that decided to lose a heel as I was walking to Connecticut a couple weeks ago – Damn Carlos Santana – stick to guitars pal – your heels snap off) There was my new schizophrenic friend sitting on the steps of a church on 18th Street having a conversation with the stairs. Must have been a good one because he was laughing his ass off. Watch out for this Psych major or I may diagnose you as well.

Back to work…..although I may not be motivated until Wednesday. I cannot wait until Trent posts his celebrity gossip (http://trent.blogspot.com/ ) for the day. So exciting!

S

Muffler vs. Jimmy Choo

So since I figured out how to steal the Internet from the Midas I am sitting at while waiting for my car (more than just a muffler I might add) to be fixed. I am contemplating telling my new mechanic friend that I would much rather buy several pairs of CHOO’s than get the damn car fixed. There are several reasons so here is my pro and con list

PRO
- More BBB blogs, because I will be riding the train more
- My feet love getting presents.
- Shoes are better than an exhaust system pipes and a muffler
- Shoes are pretty, metal is not – unless its platinum.


CON
- How comfortable could a $600 pair of shoes really be? The $200 pair that I own was like walking on glass shards when I wore them.
- I honestly do not need any more shoes. I have a hard enough time getting my two feet to wear the gazillion pair that I own.
- It’s embarrassing to drive around in a car that sounds like your little brothers tricked out Honda Civic.

I am sure I could think of a million more reason to get the shoes instead, however I just had this adult rationalization moment (damnit! I hate when that happens) and decided my CHOO’s will come in due time. I should act responsibility and get the freakin car fixed.


S

get your drink on

let me get a few things out of the way - i enjoy going out with my friends after work, causing a little ruckus, behaving badly. hell, i did it last night! i also enjoy riding the metro after - for some reason, it's just more fun after a few cheap beers - it's almost like a ride!! but i digress...last night, after a few at a downtown bar, a friend and i were riding (wheeeee!) orange crush home - he gets off at vienna, so he had much further to go. anyway, we moved to the middle of the car like good little met-chro riders, but couldn't help overhearing the small group of people behind us, sitting near the door. there were 5 of them - 2 were sitting together, 1 by himself, 1 standing and one girl sitting next to someone very obviously not a part of the group (unless she was the den mother...). for starters, standing stan kept leaning over den mother, no doubt making her uncomfortable. home-chica sitting next to den mama kept making out-of-context comments, like "I am a heterosexual," loud enough for everyone to hear. granted, my tact seems to magically disappear after i've been drinking, so i have no doubt i was openly staring - yet, it seemed the rest of the nice folks on our very full car were staring too, and they couldn't have all been a few beers in (or...could they...). my friend and i could hardly contain our laughter at their obnoxiousness. they said something about clarendon ballroom, so i was relieved that they wouldn't be exiting the train with me - my friend confirmed that half got off in clarendon, the rest a few stops down. hmm - looks like a few couldn't hang, eh? tsk, tsk...

to sum up: i'm all about being drunk in public, so i'm hardly one to criticize. however, just like the shouting into the cell phones, please don't tell the world your business (that goes for you, miss heterosexual). you may be in da club gettin' tipsy, but you can control the volume a tad, can't you? and if not, maybe you should put down the mad dog 20-20 and drink some bartles & james instead...just a suggestion...

happy friday everyone!
B

A wonderful weekend is upon us (or me - HA)……

There will be no fantastic spats of humor from this girl tomorrow. I am using a day to get a muffler for my car, which has become loud and rather embarrassing to drive around. I have put it off way to long. It is screaming for me to get it fixed. So I hope everyone has a great weekend and be sure to fill me in on any fun CHRO’ stories from the weekend.

Lets also remind our counterparts and contributors to not forget to Blog….It is highly unlikely that we can go a day without something exciting happening.

LATA!

S

Welcome to the mobile Andre Chrecky Salon.....

Props to the guy who was such a good sport on the BBB last night. After enduring the pouring rain and gusty wind like the rest of us, he also had the enjoyment of having a female sit down next to him who was having Hair extension issues. She proceeds to fix her extensions until they both arrived at their respected stop - Potomac Avenue. Had it been me, I would have offered to help since she practically had her hair stretched out to the window. This guy was such a good sport about it too; he just kept inching his way closer to the window as she outstretched her hair. This guy deserves a reward

BTW – there is a time and place for everything. Generally, people would do this in the confinement of their own home or in a restroom. No- not here in DC. Anything goes in this town. So do not be surprised when you see some crazy woman giving herself a pedicure. It will be me – utilizing my “Metro Time”.

Out…
S

"walk left, stand right"

ok, so we all get this, i know - but why in god's/allah's/bono's name do u think you're going to make it on the train when you're at the top of the escalator and the metro-lady is already saying "doors closing"??? i had just finished working out, expending all my strength, when some charming young lady came barrelling down the escalator. now, i was standing to the right, due to the aforementioned lack of strength to walk down the escalator, as i should be, but this lovely woman still managed to PLOW into me - no, i'm not exagerrating. if it hadn't been for the moving hand-rail, i would've been made into a processed food of some type by those menacing metal teeth on the edge of the escalator stairs. but, to my complete and waaaaay too obvious satisfaction (insert obnoxious laugh *HERE*), my near-killer didn't make her precious train - BBB, if you were wondering. she shot me quite the dirty look, but that just made me laugh louder. at any rate, as i was boarding orange crush, i looked over and saw her boarding into a different car - SHE DIDN'T EVEN NEED TO GET ON THE BIG BAD BLUE!! ah, biatches ain't sheit but hos and tricks...

your friend,
B

"Please Stand Clear.........."

If you want to get to work on time, do everyone a favor and “please stand clear of the doors, thank you.” It is not a new concept people – we are constantly reminded daily (several times) to do just that. Then you all get pissed off when we are off loaded due to door problems. The solution is simple…..idiots!

S

An Afterthought......

Last Friday (11/11) I had the opportunity of going to the Chophouse for dinner and drinks with some friends. It was fabulous and the food is great. The plan was to go there and then head to a friends house for a party. Needless to say 4 (I think) gin and tonics later we headed to our friends house - where "stiff drinks" (KEYWORD) were being served. Lord only knows how many I drank there (I was thirsty what can I say?). Later I ended up riding the train from Gallery Place to Metro Center then transferring (Yay public transportation - say no to drinking and driving). Ordinarily I would directly take the BBB, however it was very backed up. So wise one (me, of course) decided that we would get home so much faster if we took the ORANGE CRUSH to Stadium Armory (like the BBB was going to run through the OC's in front of him). Anyhow....as I was sitting in Stadium Armory, I began to do the "pee pee dance". I was desperate, I had to go or I was squatting on the tracks (and pray not to be electrocuted by the high voltage track). I decided to take a chance and use my charm to hit up the station manager for a pass into the depths of the WMTA's holes to use their potty. The nice lady kindly allowed me and I will have to say I was rather impressed. Clean (must have done it earlier that evening) and not smelly. After a sign of relief the train finally came..........30 MINUTES LATER...

S

the line of sunshine

i feel sorry for the yellow line. sunshine kinda got the raw end of the deal - the only stops she "owns" are Eisenhower and Huntington - the rest she shares with Big Bad Blue and the Green Machine. i understand the point - to prevent overcrowding on the other lines - but i don't think sunshine gets much credit. she stops at 3 very busy stops: the airport, dreaded metro center AND gallery place. i suppose you could make the same argument for B.B.B., but he gets to cover quite a bit more ground than my gal sunshine. so, if anyone out there is a frequent user of my line o' sunshine, give the home-girl a shout out for me, and tell her i'll make a point to visit any chance i can.

much love,
B

Map of Hell

Metro Playground and Monkey Bars???

So aside from having to push my way on a crowded train (See my blog below - "IT POURED!"). I had to endure a 15 minute ride (slight exaggeration - but that's what it felt like) to L'Enfant Plaza from Farragut West hanging like an ape from the bar that runs across the ceiling of the car. Now mind you, I am 5'1 and that's pushing it. Mr. Dreadlocks felt that he needed the whole bar that runs from floor to ceiling to support himself and his "hair", which left me no choice but to dangle for a little awhile. Takes talent to listen to an ipod read a book and apehang. Maybe I should have just taken the "Red" to the zoo instead of attempting to go home.

On a side note - I drove in today which is almost as bad -except I am in control of the radio, the driving, and the scenery - which was interesting since George Clinton was standing on Rt. 4 waving a bible with one hand and at cars with his other...oh what a morning.

Yours Truly,
S

i heart crazy foreigners

some strange foreign man grabbed my ass at rosslyn just as the doors were closing, so alas! i couldn't escape. when i turned to look at him, he had a big grin on his face. on one hand, i can't complain - that's the most action i've had in over a month. on the other hand...ewww...and i wasn't going to drink tonight - damn you, foreign man! call me?

Lucky day on the CHRO'

=) So far......I am sure my ride home will be hell considering I (i) either was still drunk from last night and have passed out to remember any incidents or (ii) just didn't give a damn (highly unlikely) or (iii) just got lucky like the title said. Anyhow like the saying goes - "when it rains it pours" and I am sure it will be pouring this evening. Will keep you posted on the o' so fun ride on the Big Bad Blue.

S

i heart the met-chro

welcome to our blog! we decided that since we bitch to each other about our metro experiences every day, we might as well share our misery with the rest of you! i will be discussing my trip into our wonderful city from virginia - my partner-in-crime will discuss her (much longer) trek in from merry-land.just so you get an idea of what we're about, here are some general wonderings:-why do people sit on the floor of a train during rush hour? i wanted to kick this teenager's ass last week, and i sooo don't know how to fight...-who's the dude that keeps pushing the bus transfer button, making the tickets spit out EVERYWHERE? trust me, it's not going to spit out a "free met-chro rides for a year" ticket...-why must your ipod/cd player volume be up so loud? earphones are supposed to serve a purpose, not add to the problem...hell, i probably like that song too, but i doubt grandma moses next to me really digs on kanye...well, that's all i wanted to start off with - these things just come to me, especially at night after my 8th bottle of wine...but i digress. why do i continue to take the met-chro if all i do is bitch, you say? because my life would not be near as interesting as i'm sure it is if i sat in traffic on 66 in my car with no a/c